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Urdu, Hindi and English Funny SMS Messages and Jokes of the Month

Yoga teacher to a woman: Has yoga any effect over your husband’s drinking habit?
Woman: Yes, an amazing funny effect! Now he drinks the whole bottle standing upside down over his head.

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Banta: Kal Muje 10 logo ne Peeta.
Santa: Phir tune kya kiya?
Banta: Maine kaha salon Ek-Ek karke aao.
Santa: Phir?
Banta: Phir kya, Salon ne ek-ek karke dubara Peeta!
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Pathan’s Friend: What is call girl?
Pathan: Khocha jab ap kisi ko call karta hai, Tab ek larki call per bolti hai k aap ka blnce na kafi hai, us ko call girl bolte hain.
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SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY
Dont get confused, Aray Baba SORRY means:
S->Some,
O->One Is,
R->Really,
R->Remembering
Y->You..
Have A wonderful day!
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Dard dene waale bahut milte hai,
Magar dard lene waale kam milte hai,
Nazuk waqt me hume zarur yaad karna,
Kyuki zindagi me chahne waale bahut kam milte hai.
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I can’t find a reason why Life Introduced Me to You..
But that’s not the question.
Question is: How life knew that I needed a lovely one like you???
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Yaaden Aansu hoti to chalak jati,
Yaaden likhawat hoti to padhi jati,
Yaaden to zindgi me basa wo ehsas hai,
Jo lakh kosiso ke baad bhi lafzo me nahi simat pati..
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unique funny joke best collection
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1 Bacha ek ghar ki bell bajane ki koshish kr raha tha:
1 Baba G ne dekha to us k pas ja k Bell beja di or pocha beta or koi kam ho to btao.
Bacha: Baba nass hun.
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Inspector to Banta: Phaansi se pehle, bata teri antim ichha kya hai?
Banta: Mere pair upar aur sir neeche kar k faansi de do..
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BOY 2 girl: Tu hi to Jannat meri,
Tu hi mera junon or kuach na janu me,
Bas itna hi janu,
Tujme RAB dikhta hai YARA me kya kru.
Girl: Mattha tek or Dafaa ho.
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Aap Humko Achy lagty Ho,
Door jaty ho jitna utna Dil k Qareeb lagty ho,
Meri Qismat main tum nahi lekin,
Phir bhi mujhko Apna Naseeb Kyon Lagty ho?
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Koi Pal Bina Tumhary,
Bhala Kese Beet Jaye.
Mere Paas tum nahi ho,
Meri Yaad k nagar Main.
Mere Khuab k Safar main,
Meri Soch ki Tahon Main,
Meri aankh k Bhanwar main
Bas Aarzu Tumhari,
Is Aarzu se aagy,
Koi Raasta Nahi hai,
Tumhain Kis Qadar hai Chaha
Ye Tumhain Pata nahi Hai.

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Aik sardar Europe gaya wahan us ko police ne roka aur investigation start kar di..
Sardar ko English nai aati thi..
Us ne Sick Leave ki Application suna di.
Police ne use Pagal samajh k chor dia..
Wife: Wah sardar jee tusi te great o.
Sardar: O A tey kuch vi nai Hale te may Thirsty Crow nai sunai..

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Aaj ksi ne mjhe phon kya
Aur
AaP k barey me kuch btya
Me us ka naam to nhi bta skta
Per
Wo aap k barey me keh raha tha k aap
* some text missing *

Funny Jokes
2 bachey jungl main poti ker rehey they achank lione aa geya
pehla bacha
chote dar tu nahi raha
dosra bacha nahi main nahi darta
pehla bacha tu saley apni doh mari kyun doh raha hai
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agar aap kahin jaa rahe ho or KALI BILI apke aage se guzar jaye to iska kia matlab he???????????????????

is ka matlab hai

k

KALI BILI bhi kahin jaa rahi hai
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Can v do romance in the evening today?

I’m in a good mood
Just a little bit of kissing and biting

reply me soon!

urs lovingly

“MOSQUITO”

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Funny Jokes

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If I was an artist,
you would be my picture!
If I was a poet,
you would be my inspiration!
If I was an author you would be my story!

But I’m only a cartoonist!
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What is the height of telling a lie?
A negro telling his girlfriend, “tenu kaala chasma jachda hai, jachda hai gore mukhde te”
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Teacher: Agar apna character sudharna hai to sab auraton ko MAA kaha karo.
Student: Madam is se mera character to theek rahega, par mere baap ka bigad jayega
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Medical Shayari
When you breathe, you respire!
Wah Wah!
When you breathe, you respire!
Wah Wah!

When you don’t breathe, you expire!
Wah Wah, kya baat hai!
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Jise koyal samjhe, woh kauwa nikla. Dosti ke naam
par hauwa nikla. Jo roka karte they humein
sharab peene se, aaj unki jeb se pauwa nikla.
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Media: Prince, bahar aa kar acha lag raha hai?
Prince: Kya acha lagega? Andar choclate thi,
pastry thi, milk badam tha. Thodi der aur ruk
jaate shayad Bipasha bhi aa jati.
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Boy: I am not rich like rohit, I don’t even have
a bid car like rohit. But I really love you!
Girl: I love you too, but tell me more about rohit..
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Funny SMS
Funny Jokes

When i open my eyes every morning i pray to God
that everyone should have a friend like you….
Why should only i suffer!!!
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One day Santas Girlfriend asks him, Darling, om
our Engagement will you give me a RING?Santa:Ya
sure, Give me ur Telephone No.
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When I was born Devil said…Oh Shit!!! Another
GOD!!!..& When u were born devil said …
Oh Shit!!!!Competition…!!! ….
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Fill in the blank…Im ur …..friend-
a)-Cute b)-Sweet c)-Loving d)-Boy/Girl
e)-Best of all Reply is a must…
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Do U know the fullform of COLLEGE- C-Come,O-On,
L-Lets, L-Love, E-Each,G-Girl,E-Equally……
Thats why boys go to college regularly….
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Who said english is easy???Fill in the blank with
YES or No… 1.—–I dont have brain…
2.—–I dont have sence… 3.—–I am stupid….
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If ur world is spining Round & Round..& Round….
Ur heart is beating fast ,do u think its LOVE?
na Munna na its called high B/P…
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Merry Christmas, Enjoy New Year, Happy Easter,
Good luck on Valentines, Spooky Halloween &
Happy Birthday Now bug off and don’t annoy me
for the next 12 months!!!!
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Funny Jokes
funny Jokes –  Jokes
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what happend 2 ur mobile? i was trying 2 call u
but i got this msg: welcome 2 D jungle network,D
monkey u r tring 2 call is on tree plz try later.
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First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring,
then the suffering
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Last night I lay in my bed looking at the
beautiful stars, the moon and the sky…then i
thought where the fuck is my roof
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Birdy birdy in the sky dropped a poopy in my eye,
I don’t worry I don’t cry, I’m just happy that
cows can’t fly!
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If your a Vegetarian to be nice to animals, why
are you eating there food
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keep sharing😀😀😉😉😉
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